Cheap Solutions To An Expensive Problem

I just discovered a change in me. No it is not puberty and yes, I am still bloody stuck in army. So what could it be? I guess it is the poems that have been coming up lately in which every single one of them is a true representation of my feelings now and then. "The Next Eternity" marks the end of my pursuit for something that I shouldn't be even pursuing in the first place. It originated when I heard the song by Jeff Chang and I felt it was worth penning down as the lyrics touched me deeply. The latest is just about a dream that I have quite often in camp while the weird one in between about the RIGHT girl is just a wild wacky thought of mine. It sure feels good to be able to confide and express feelings this way when inspirations run thick and fast through my mind. I'm sure more will be coming up in this space as I spend each passing day in camp.

This weekend has been a different one though as I got the "exclusive" privilege of spending Saturday night out at the Padang, enjoying the clear night view and the starry night. But it was rather unfortunate as I clearly did not remember opting to go for such an activity. Its kind of like those e-mails where they claim that you have won a prize as you have signed up for something which you don't remember in the first place. And like always, just as we classify these e-mails as spam, that star-gazing activity was similar in a way, very frustrating, irritating and useless to the person having to deal with it. From the way that I have described it, you probably would have guessed that such a nonsensical activity have got something to do with the army, and you probably would have been right. It was the Sheares Bridge Run held in conjunction with the army half-marathon. Judging the amount of work needed to be done just to hold a half marathon, I really cannot bear to imagine the things needed to do if they decided to hold a full marathon. They would probably start preparations for next year's event once the current one finishes.

I guess the reason that "Sheares Bridge Run" was more emphasised than "army half-marathon" was mainly because most of the competitive runners (particularly those who ran well and actually won top prizes) were in fact, not from the army. Well, I suppose they had to link the term "army half-marathon" together with it in order to get free labour to help out with the preparations and the proceedings. Cheap move no doubt but hey, we've got nothing to do in the army as well. This may prove to be the solution to a current problem we are facing now, whether to build a casino here or not.

While the masses are busy debating the pros and cons of a casino here or how it may damage people's life and family, I thought of a brilliant solution that could increase the revenue of our country if the proposed idea of a casino came through. Instead of hiring people to man the casino, they could actually use people from the army, seeing that we really don't have anything much to do anyway. It is a cheap source of labour after all and there surely would not be a shortage of manpower since it is bloody compulsory. Guys having to serve would, for the first time, actually enjoy themselves and keep busy. What way to better serve our nation than to help improve our revenue. Seeing that the only enemies clear and present to us are the extremists and terrorists, we could invite them in for a little wager or two and let them have a good time. And if we get lucky ourselves, they may get so addicted that the so-called "harmful and ruining" effects due to an overdose of gambling may take effect on their lives and eventually destroy their family, which is the terrorist networks. Well if that fails, they may just find us a pleasant little country after all and leave us alone after collecting their winnings, since it is better to make another friend rather than an enemy.

Lost, Will I Be Found?

The warmth of the sunshine comforts my face,
The light from the day takes away my loneliness
Never again am I trapped
Nor captured within senseless measures...

My life went back to what it used to be
Everything fell into place... I felt free
A sense of familiarity overcame me as
I got back what I had lost
I'm alive once more...

I had the freedom I once took for granted,
I regained consciousness to live life
I was filled with the lost innocence of my childhood,
I felt what I had not for a long long time...

Could this be...
A breakaway from my dreaded life?
A redemption for myself?
My second chance to make it right?

The cold darkened room greeted me as I opened my eyes,
I awoke to witness reality unfolding
A harsh reminder of where I actually am,
No way of escaping, all is lost...

Somebody wake me because I must be sleeping...

Dreaming Of The Right Girl

CAPTIVATING
RAVISHING
EASY-GOING
TRUSTWORTHY
ELEGANT
SLENDER
ENDEARING
FRIENDLY
ALLURING

The Next Eternity

On the day that bordered us apart
You did not say goodbye
And all I have left are images of you...
In my mind.

I stand alone wondering if love was ever present
Or am I just breaking my heart
I could not find an eternity with you
In our memories past.

If tomorrow I awake as a different person,
I will not love you again as a sinner
Never to remember that I had once loved you
Letting go of painful memories that my mind once filled.

Time itself is a test for us
Memories of our sad story are all became to dust
Scarred my heart with my pain numbed, those wounds will never heal
Accompanying me in my lonely quest for the next eternity with you.

Hopefully tomorrow I awake as a different person
Never to love you again as before
Hopefully I can forget you were once my inspiration
To accept life as it is and to love again.

Wishing...
That one day if we shall meet
We will embrace with open arms
And cherish the next eternity.

Hoping one day...
If we can ever reunite in our memories
We will be in the next eternity... together

Pure Madness from Within

There is only one word that can describe the way my weekend has been. Crazy. Crazy for different reasons though, particularly for what I had managed to accomplish. To begin with, I finally got the opportunity to see an idol of mine up, close and personal. The ten-year wait came to a pleasant end when I turned up for his concert at the Indoor Stadium and it was one hell of a show, his standard of singing extremely outstanding. The hectic chase for this idol of mine brought me to Junction 8 the following day for his autograph session. I am not one who craze over any other celebrities but only those who are really and truly talented. I can now safely say the ten-year following have not been wasted.

Talented celebrities is becoming a rare species nowadays, somewhat nearing to the point of being extinct. I found out about this fact while watching the Singapore Hit Awards show. It just tells me something, that new artistes nowadays have become really really horrible. If the awards are to be presented to them, I suppose they should just name it as Singapore Horror Awards. Some of the awards were presented to certain artistes who did not deserve them in the first place, yet they still have a strong fan base and following here. Other artistes who deserved the awards ended up with zilch, no recognition for their excellent work.

A particular singer caught my attention, for the wrong reasons. He had an absolutely terrible singing voice that screeches everytime he tries to hit a high note and he just looks like your regular neighbourhood gangster that hangs out in coffeeshops. Which makes me wonder why he won best local artiste in the first place. His name sounded something like "dozen" in chinese.

Well, that certainly did not spoil much of my wonderful weekend. I even managed to squeeze in a movie between my busy schedule. "The Terminal" was a great movie with an exceptionally talented cast and absorbing plot that was comedic yet meaningful at the same time. Though the woman sitting next to me did freaked me out when she started sobbing midway through the movie. But other than that I really enjoyed the movie, especially when you have Catherine Zeta-Jones as an air stewardess.

The weekend came to a beautiful end when I got another chance to see another air stewardess (in this case, air stewardess in the making), this time in a picture. Not Catherine Zeta-Jones of course but close. All good things always come to an end and they truly did when reality hit me, telling me I have to return to camp. At least I will know that for this week, all I have in my photographic memory will be Jeff Chang, Catherine Zeta-Jones and another air stewardess friend, to take me through to the next weekend.

Brainless Thoughts

While wasting my life away in camp, one of my friends gave me a pretty good thought to ponder about, thus presenting me with the opportunity to actually use my brain in camp. I jumped on that idea excitedly, seeing that I finally had something decent to do, but the question he had asked stumped me quite abit. "Why must we be in the army?" he lamented. Noticing that I was visibly stunned, he simply drooped his shoulders and walked away, resigned to his fate. That particular question, having crossed my mind before, had troubled me since but I shrugged it off as I just could not figure out the answer.

Now that it has resurfaced, I was tempted to give him the same age-old answers that I have been hearing, "It is because you're a guy and it is your responsibility" or "Because you are born and raised here in Singapore". Considering that he himself might have heard it a billion times before, I decided against my initial response for my own well-being as he looked irate and frustrated when he approached me, desperate for an answer that made sense. Staying in these camps can really drive you crazy at times.

NS is also known as national service... I marveled at my brilliance. But if that is the case, then shouldn't the entire population be serving the army if it is on a national scale? Nah, not a good explanation. If I followed the four lettered word that is emblazoned on the back of all the dull grey t-shirts that we are made to wear, ARMY would just simply mean A Really Meaningless Youth, since it has become their practice to capture innocent young civilian men and enforce onto them the military life, thus wasting 2.5 years of their precious youth. I am sure my friend would have been pretty contented with that answer, more for wit than reason, but he had already left.

Maybe the myth of losing your brain cells when you enter the army really has some truth in it after all. Having just moved to another camp for whatever training, a few of us came upon a drab and empty room that seemed to have been vacated since the last World War, multi-layered of dust and five-year old lizards greeted us when we entered. We could not do much but to bunk in that room. The unthinkable happened. A portly figure appeared at the door early next morning. No it is not a ghost although its facial features had a certain amount of similarity. "It" spoke out in a stern voice that sounded more like a warning, "Do you all realise that this is an office ah? How can you all bunk in here huh?" I realised he happened to be some big shot from that camp. I stared at the so-called "office" and turned to him, immediately wondering if he had ever seen a real office before. Perhaps in the army, the level of IQ you possess is inversely proportionate to your rank.

The strangest thing to happen had yet to come. Another friend of mine approached a guy who was just about to go for his night off and requested a favour from him. He apparently had a craving for some food from KFC and so he said, "Hey get me a colonial burger later k?"

Images of a clumsily made burger with a british flag sticking out on the top flooded my mind as I tried to fathom out what he intended to say. It wasn't until very much later when I figured out that he must have been trying to say colonel burger then my mind rested at ease. This just proves that staying overly long in camp indeed kills your brain cells away.