It's official - I have given 'my first time' away. It was just after midnight on Sunday and my female colleague initiated the idea, "Hey, can you fetch me home since its on the way?" I hesitantly agreed, though it was technically not on the way but rather a detour, but I did not want to turn her down.
Unconsciously, SHE became my first ever female passenger on my car (not counting mum, sis, aunt and what-not). Well, it was not what I quite had in mind when I first received word that I could had the car for a whole week as Dad had to make a business trip but God, somehow or rather, intended for that to happen. I had come to a point where questioning God's decisions about my situations had provided me with answers as clear as the visibility you get by looking out of your window into the hazy skies these days. There seem to be no further indication of what lies ahead hence I decided on the wiser option of following early signs of events as indicators of potential problem areas, bringing the Da Vinci Code from reel to real life.
It was an uphill task, putting myself in Prof Langdon's shoes, for it was not so much that his shoe size was probably much larger than mine but largely because where he had the lovely Sophie Neveu cracking codes with him, I'm alone by myself still looking for my own "Sophie". Most important of all, "codes" in life are much, much harder to decode. It often involves looking beyond the surface of things.
Only recently did I realise the usefulness of books after I discovered an extremely wonderful answer that practically solves every problem in life in my sociology text. I also found more answers in another book about Buddhism that was distributed during matriculation fair which was aptly named "How to overcome difficulties in life". Comprehending these primary signs, I guess it probably means I would be better off drowning myself in books rather than relationship trouble.
Originally, I had meant to save the title of my first female passenger for a particular 'someone'. It must mean something for this 'unfortunate' event to happen when my chance of realizing my dream was just a mere 8 hours away. In the end, it did not matter as the "intended party" turned down my invitation. At that moment, I was thrown into deep confusion as every logical reason as to why she may reject me evaded my mind. Did she not trust my driving? Or she simply preferred a 1.6cc vehicle to my humble 1.3cc vehicle from what I observed on previous occasions? And, what does it really mean when words you do not wish to hear ("She treats you like a good friend...", "Why do you keep falling for the wrong girl?" and what-not) just never stops blasting into your eardrums? As a normal emotional human defined by the sociologists, it is normal for me to attach meaning to different things and in order to preservere my existence, I obviously had to put meaning into those signs to derive guidance. Well, a picture paints a thousand words and from a particular picture I inadvertently saw on another handphone not belonging to me, the only words in my mind are too obscene to be mentioned here.
Nonetheless, my female friends from all walks of life took turns for a ride in my "rented" vehicle. (Nah, just two of them.) One of them, Xue, gave me the biggest shock of my life by asking the following while I sped smoothly along Lornie Road. "Hey, you like any girl in school now?" It almost caused an accident. I provided a diplomatic but truthful answer, "Hmm... Yea. But not in school. She's...(explicit details not to be published)." Xue then revealed some of her thoughts in exchange and it felt great to be able to air some of my problems with a neutral party, at least for that period of time.
Mid-week was bright and cheery for me. Driving to school with a distinguished passenger was simply a pleasure and my honour. How I wished this was a sign of things to come and a glimpse of the future some ten, twenty years down the road... The hope that such beautiful thoughts and dreams had kept me sane, largely because of the many restrictions and complications of reality. I had also made an amazing discovery that a Mcdonald's egg mcmuffin breakfast could last me till dinner!
Well, it has been a good experience driving my way around. At least it kept me away from driving myself crazy for the time being. Serene's comments of me being an excellent driver was greatly appreciated too. It was nice being praised about something that I take much pride in, irregardless of other egregious criticism and ludicrous comments that was not entirely justified and uncalled for. Looking forward to my blog's 50th published post coming pretty soon... Till then and till the next driving adventure!
